IELTS Essay: Retirement Homes/Communities

Nowadays some older people choose to live in retirement communities and centers with other people, rather than living with their adult children.

Is this a positive or negative development?

Analysis

1. It is becoming increasingly common for senior citizens to retire to assisted care facilities instead of remaining at home with their children. 2. In my opinion, though these institutions often have a reputation for abuse, it is a positive trend as it liberates younger generations.

1. Paraphrase the overall essay topic.
2. Write a clear opinion.

1. Detractors of such communities highlight notable instances of abuse. 2. These are detailed in frequent, highly publicized, exposés from reputable news organizations on a regular basis. 3. Many of these incidents become criminal or civil cases and the instances of mistreatment are memorably cruel. 4. Elderly people have been known to be beaten, demeaned and neglected in terms of their basic sanitary needs. 5. These vulnerable individuals often lack the ability to defend themselves or voice the abuse to visiting family. 6. However, considering the total number of seniors in assisted care facilities, abuse is rare and likely to decrease in the future as technology allows for closer monitoring of employees.

1. Write a topic sentence with a clear main idea at the end.
2. Explain your main idea.
3. Develop it with specific or hypothetical examples.
4. Keep developing it fully.
5. Add more deatil.
6. I end here by switching to the other side – the side I agree with.

1. Overall, I believe retirement communities to be a positive as they are liberating for families. 2. This applies to the seniors themselves as, though they may be restricted from leaving the premises, they can interact with their peers and form meaningful, new bonds. 3. The greatest benefits, however, are for the family unit as a whole. 4. Families are rarely equipped with the medical training or financial resources to support aging individuals. 5. For instance, it is a nearly impossible task for a family where both mother and father work to look after an ailing parent as well as their own young children. 6. They are likely to lack some combination of energy, will, means, and time. 7. By placing their parents in an elderly home, they will have more time to invest in raising their own children and advancing at work, which will itself increase the standard of living for all family members.

1. Write a new topic sentence with a new main idea at the end.
2. Explain your new main idea.
3. Include specific details and examples.
4. Add as much information as you can and make sure it links logically.
5. Develop the example fully.
6. Vary long and short sentences.
7. Try not to write this many sentences…

1. In conclusion, the risk of possible abuse at retirement homes does not overshadow the benefits generally for families. 2. This is a sensitive topic but each individual must decide what is in their own best interests.

1. Summarise your main ideas.
2. Include a final thought.